Breakups suck, and there is really no nice way to put it. They are always hard, whether the relationship ended on good terms or blew up in flames, the days that follow can be an emotional rollercoaster.

In the middle of all the hurt, confusion, and late-night overthinking, it’s easy to slip into habits that only make things worse.

So, if you are going through it right now, here are six things you really should NOT do right after ending things with your partner – no matter how tempting they might feel in the moment.

1. Don’t stalk them online

It’s one of the first things people do – open social media (Facebook or Instagram) to check if they have posted any stories, hoping they would put some heartbreaking posts, which might give you some solace.

But here’s the thing: the more you check their socials, the more it messes with your head. Every post feels personal; every update feels like a message to you (even when it’s not).

If you constantly keep tabs on someone you are not supposed to be with, it will only keep you stuck. So, take the plunge and unfollow, mute, or best BLOCK them.

Do everything you need to do for your peace. And no, this does not mean that you are weak or being petty; it simply means that you are protecting your peace, which is necessary for your healing.

2. Don’t beg for closure

The urge to text them just one more time for answers can be strong. You want to understand what went wrong, hear them explain, and maybe even fix things.

But more often than not, those conversations do not give you any clarity; instead, they leave you more confused or hurt.

Closure does not always come from the other person. Sometimes, it’s about accepting what happened, even when you don’t have all the answers. Trust that with time, the confusion will clear.

3. Don’t jump into something new right away

We get it – rebounding can be a quick way to distract yourself or feel wanted again. But jumping into a new thing too soon can be super messy and might leave you even more confused and hurt than before.

Give yourself some time to heal from your last relationship and focus on yourself for some time. Do things for yourself instead of jumping into something right away.

You owe it to yourself to sit with the hurt a little. Process it. Let it teach you something. Real healing takes time, and you don’t want to carry old wounds into something new.

4. Don’t isolate yourself

You might want to just disappear from everyone’s life. You turn off your phone, ignore everyone’s messages, and avoid people altogether. But that is not the solution to your problem.

Sure, a little solitude is okay; people need time to reflect on what went wrong and if you were at fault, but isolating yourself completely can make the sadness way heavier than it already is.

Let someone in, even if it’s just one friend. Vent, cry, be silent – do whatever you need to do. Sometimes, just being around people who care is enough to start feeling better.

5. Don’t blame yourself for everything

It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking, “Maybe if I had done this differently, they would have stayed.”

But this approach is not healthy. Those “ifs” and “buts” won’t help you heal. Instead of fixating on the past, focus on what you can learn from the experience and use it to grow.

Being honest about your part is healthy but constantly beating yourself up over the past? Not so much. You are allowed to make mistakes. You are also allowed to grow and move on without carrying guilt that is not entirely yours.

6. Don’t rush your healing

Everyone is on their own timeline in life. Just because someone else moved on quickly does not mean that you will, too.

Healing is never linear, and it does not happen overnight. You have to give yourself time. Some days, you will feel okay; other days, you will feel like you are back to square one, and that’s completely normal.

Everyone goes through these phases, but some people are strong enough to hide their emotions, especially those that make them look vulnerable and weak.

You don’t need to do that – feel all your emotions and learn from your mistakes. Time will heal all your wounds, and you will emerge from the ashes – much stronger and better!

Final Thoughts:

Don’t force yourself to “be fine” before you actually are. Take your time. Feel what you need to feel. You are not being weak – you are just being human.

And slowly, day by day, you will find your way back to yourself.